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Cartoons: Kids Say the Darndest Things

Published: September 8, 2011

“I’m usually more polite than this, but my mom says there’s no pleasing you.”

"I'm usually more polite than this, but my mom says there’s no pleasing you."

From Mar/Apr 2007

One thing I’ve noticed about kids and cartoonists: they say things we wish we could say. But kids get in trouble for it.

“I sure miss the good old days—before Mom got wise to me.”

"I sure miss the good old days—before Mom got wise to me." from Jan/Feb 2003

From Jan/Feb 2003

I suspect mom misses the good old days before she had to get wise to you.

“Did you hear my dad snore?”

"Did you hear my dad snore?"

From Nov/Dec 2005

Hey, that was the coolest part of the service.

“Dad took me to the zoo. Our animal came in first and paid $18.00.”

"Dad took me to the zoo. Our animal came in first and paid $18.00"

From Jan/Feb 2005

Honestly, dads, you have to coach these kids better.

“I don’t believe in the stork, Easter Bunny, or Santa anymore, and I’m beginning to have my doubts about Alan Greenspan.”

"I don't believe in the stork, Easter Bunny or Santa anymore, and I'm beginning to have my doubts about Alan Greenspan."

From Sep/Oct 2001

Honestly, with the stuff adults tell you, how do you know what to believe?

“How’s the old prostate, Dad?”

 "How's the old prostate, Dad?"

From Sep/Oct 1999

There you go—get your facts from TV commercials.

“My broker says not to sell; I’m still young enough to make up my losses.”

"My broker says not to sell: I’m still young enough to make up my losses."

From Jul/Aug 2001

Sigh. Oh, geeze, kid, I sure hope so.

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  • Enjoyed all the cartoons, this old world needs more humor!!!!

  • Charles Neumann

    Very funny.