Sept/Oct 2014 Limerick Laughs Winner and Runners-Up

Witches riding broomsticks in the night sky surrounded by bats

I asked on her annual all-nighter
Did the moon glow make Halloween brighter?
She gave nary a blink,
But with one naughty wink,
Said, “Moonshine makes broomsticks much lighter.”

—Terry Free, Andover, Minnesota

Congratulations to Terry Free! For her limerick describing Eugene Iverd’s illustration Witches’ Night Out (above), Terry wins $25 — and our gratitude for a job well done. If you’d like to enter the Limerick Laughs Contest for our upcoming issue, submit your limerick via our online entry form.

Of course, Terry’s limerick wasn’t the only one we liked! Here are some of our favorite limericks from our runners-up, in no particular order:

There once was a witch named Min
Who owned an unfortunate chin.
And, to add to her woes,
Just look at her nose!
It seems the poor thing just can’t win!

—Betty Checkett, St. Louis, Missouri

October above Cincinnati:
A witch who’s a little bit catty
Is stuck in a jam.
She believes it’s a scam,
And it’s certainly driving her batty.

—Neal Levin, Bloomfield Hills, Michigan

That witch is one scary sight
As she flies on her broom through the night.
Small children decide
That it’s safer inside
As they cover their heads in their fright.

—Pat Chambers, Atlantic Beach, North Carolina

Brunhilda, the witch, and her broom
Through gloomy dark nights they would zoom.
A bat got in the way
To Brunhilda’s dismay;
They crashed with a real loud KABOOM.

—William MacQuarrie, Omaha, Nebraska

The wicked old witch of the East
By moonlight seeks out a great feast.
She dines on dead lizards.
Seeks out bloody gizzards,
And sweets is what she likes the least.

—John Meyer, LaJolla, California

The sickening things that were seen
In the sky made me turn yellow-green.
When the goblins and witches
Caused tremors and twitches,
I knew it must be Halloween.

—Ronald Faoro, Cheshire, Connecticut

At the sight of this black magic shower,
I crawled under my bed and did cower.
Were they looking for souls
To drag into dark holes?
Or was it the witches’ rush hour?

—Patrick McKeon, Pennington, New Jersey

Miss Grizelda and all of her crones
Were preparing to rattle some bones,
But their plans went awry
When, out of the sky,
Came a pack of mysterious drones!

—Vivian Barrington, Jasper, Texas

Air traffic is busy tonight
and advancing takes all of my might!
With no zip or zoom
just a wobbly old broom,
a plane might be better for flight!

—Dolores M. Sahelian, Mission Viejo, California

In spite of their usual contentions,
The witches show up at conventions.
They must be there soon
By the light of the moon.
Their union is asking for pensions.

—Rosemary Lombard, Hillsboro, Oregon